I just have to say how very blessed I am. My kids are doing great. Nate and Amy are still in the honeymoon phase after their beautiful September wedding. James and Kayleigh are expecting a little girl. Katey is enrolled in tech school, following her dream. Meg is with me making plans to transfer to UW to finish school.
I have great friends, wonderful family, a job I enjoy, a great church with a pastor who loves his people.
There are points of pain - my ex-husband made me cry today when I found out how he responded to one of his children calling to wish him a happy thanksgiving. I guess in my mind when your family is this spread out this far, you make exceptions for dinner table phone calls and aren't rude.
I want to point out to him that you are the master of how your life is. If you want better, you have to be better, act better, treat people better, expect better of yourself. In short stop being nasty. I am tired of excuses and the blame game.
Here are things I am counting as blessings today:
My ex-husband - without him I would not know Wyoming, would not have the wonderful children I have, would not appreciate things the way I do.
My kids - my goodness they are so awesome! Yes, they make decisions I would not make for them, but they take responsibility and move forward. I genuinely like my kids and my daughters-in-law. They are great people.
My parents - so much support for me and my kids, all the time, no matter what. That carries no price tag.
My friends - Ana, Lynn, Barb, Kelly, Tami, Janice, Celia. These women have loved me through some tough stuff. Three seasons of my life consumed by battering and blessing. They hang tough, cry with me, laugh with me, sit in silence with me. I cannot thank God enough for these ladies.
My opportunities - writing for a newspaper was never on the radar. But I like it. I love it. Like any job it has its moments of when-can-I-get-out-of-here, but for the most part I love learning about people, places and things. I love being able to write, putting words on the page and stringing them together in such a way that other people can make sense of them.
My church - after being in a horrid situation for several years, I am relieved and comforted to be part of a body of believers that actually cares about people, not how they look. Calvary Chapel Mansfield gave me the first taste of that and after a short search I have found that at Pine Bluffs Baptist. People who don't go to church because they have been hurt there need to persevere. Find a church that is not a church, but a body of believers who love first and look at you second. I know churches can hurt people, seemingly irreparably, but it is so worth it to find a group of people who love regardless of marital status, how rich you are, what you look like, what kind of clothes you wear, if you drink or smoke or swear. That kind of people will make you want to better yourself and stay away from self-destructive behavior, will help you find reason for your life, and help move you into your future instead of staying in the stagnant past.
Blessings folks. Count them. And make sure you are one on someone else's list.
